The journey is the destination

AyinBase with R' Paltiel 5/6/10 ThursdayNight 22 Iyar 5770

Page 28. About half way into the main paragraph. Line starts “bechinat chochmah”. 

Torah is chochmah, since it is that which is given it has to be something that can be viewed from outside. The highest level that can be viewed from outside is chochmah.

Pleasure is the core/principle sustenance and essence of everything. Every koach, 'tho it is a koach, is maintained by pleasure.

How does tynug differ from every other koach? Pleasure is considered even more of an essence than ratzon/desire.

In every koach there is a positive and a negative and the koach comes to counter the negative. This is because it is not an essence, it is a function. It is an “action” to fill a void. “Alte rebbe, why did He make the world?” “He did it by oneg/pleasure and on pleasure there is not question since it does not come to fill a void. “ Oneg means the positive without a negative – the essence.

To make a step, there has to be an element of pleasure, just in the walking. Without this oneg element you cannot do anything, no matter how compelling the necessity of the action – it has to have a presence of its own. Despite the fact that it is a koach with a positive and negative it has an essential core.

In everything is oil. This is the essence. This is the oneg.

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... וחיי עולם

Stairway to heaven

AyinBase with R' Paltiel 5/6/10 Thursday 22 Iyar 5770

Page 28. About 10 lines into the second paragraph. 

Torah is rooted in the hidden essence of chochmah – this was discussed yesterday.

Chochmah on the one hand is an “outsider”- a koach, but on the other hand we call it hidden in the essence. This is the special quality of chochmah, based on its bitul. It relates to the inyan not on the basis of first identifying itself. The experience of sight is what I see, not that I see.

Torah is rooted actually above that in the level of tynug/pleasure.

King David described torah as song. What is missing in this description. Song is an expression of the hidden pleasure. Why was king David punished?

Torah is capable of bringing atzmus ein sof into the world. World is by definition something that was preceded by non-existence. It has a beginning, and it has a purpose. If you take away its purpose it vanishes. It does not have an essential presence. Functionality is by definition a composite.

In contrast elokus is on an essential level – it is true on and of itself. We recognize the contrast between neshamah and guf. Guf is the way things are in the world. The body has many needs and processes. Through maintenance it lives – it is not an essential life. And through all this effort it receives a spark of the neshamah. The spark of the neshamah is life itself. It is not based on a process. We experience it all the time, but cannot grasp it. We can only grasp what can be placed on a physical platform – the brain.

Atzmus is even beyond the neshamah. It does not manifest itself at all. In a certain sense we may say that in the world there is no atzmus.

Torah is supposed to connect atzmus ein sof itself to world! After Moshiach and redemption there will be a revelation of atzmus / essence in the world. Now a physical item is so concealing that it appears to exist of itself – that element will be transformed and it will show atzmus. All matters of torah will be known from the world itself – not as an add-on quality.

Torah is a memutzah that allows the ohr ein sof into this world.

The essential pleasure is dressed in torah.

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... וחיי עולם

This is the first moment of consciousness

AyinBase with R' Paltiel 5/5/10 Wednesday 21 Iyar 5770

Page 28. Third line. 

Torah is rooted in the essential pleasure, where it has not yet come down to any level of expression!

At this level it is hidden in the essence. At the level of essence there is a simple unity. There is no multiplicity, so how is tynug a defined entity? In our experience we see things emerging due to some external stimuli. We cannot conceive of the will of the nefesh coming from itself. This is a ratzon atzmi. Sechel cannot comprehend it. Sechel can only grasp things in some kind of natural order.

“I will be for him a plaything/enjoyment” - the torah is at the level of essential plaything/enjoyment. There is something that etzem enjoys. And this plaything is of that level, originating there.

What was He doing before He made the world? Was he bored stiff? This is a valid question for an entity like ourselves that is not an essential presence.

“Your laws are like songs to me”, said King David to Hashem. Your laws are my greatest pleasure. Our sages say he was punished for this statement. Why? Song is an expression of excitement of pleasure in the nefesh. This is an inner pleasure, not from some external source. The Levis would sing in the Temple at the time of service. This is like the pleasure of chochmah. On the one hand chochmah is a koach, on the other hand it is a koach that does not have its own form/presence. Sight is a mashal for this since it is a clear channel. Why not say the songs are like tynug, why say chochmah? This is because for something to be revealed on the outside through song, it must come through chochmah.

This is the first moment of consciousness.

Thus, this is the message of King David – that he recognized the essential/concealed pleasure that is in torah. Chochmah is able to sense that which is hidden. So why was he punished? Hashem said to him, “you call the laws songs?! You are focusing on an external element.”
But we saw it is a very high level, so why the reprimand?

Stay tuned for the answer.

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... וחיי עולם

I am real – He makes me

AyinBase with R' Paltiel 5/4/10 Tuesday 20 Iyar 5770

Page 28. Third line.  

That which is contained within itself, without expression, we do not see.

Tzalmenu – is an expression that is rooted in the very essence. This means that one can show of himself that one wants others to know, then there is “tzalmenu” - the moment of expression of me – who I am. This is chochmah. This is like sight. We experience chochmah without identifying with it. There is a primary knowledge that doe s not get retranslated – this is chochmah. This is what is visable as opposed to that which is shown/demonstrated.

This is like knowing oneself. We really know things since Hashem is making us see it – He is showing it to us. We don't think of it this way, since we don't think deeply into ourselves. Knowledge can be superimposed, from an external perspective. Or it can be internal, where he and the knowledge can unite. Chochmah is this level of knowledge with unity. This is a recognition that comes from realizing the Creator. All things coming from One source – I see the world and it doesn't detract from my knowledge of myself and my “personal calm”.

My being is beyond the demonstration level. I am part of reality itself, this is the level of chochmah. He makes me.

If a person seeks peace/security/quiet you may think it would be satisfying to be sent into space in a capsule. On a superficial level it is bliss, but it is worse than death since he is disassociated from reality itself.

Anything a person does for himself can be viewed as the result of some cause. But that which comes from the Creator is primary, and He made him because He made him. So as soon as he realizes it is given to him by the Creator there is no because.

Since this is not knowledge that is superimposed it must start with yourself. The animal knows things on a reactionary level. A human being has real knowledge - “what is this unto itself”. This is knowledge that is from the essence.

So far we said torah is rooted in the hidden chochmah – an emanation from the essence. It can further be said that torah is rooted within the essential pleasure/oneg itself.

This is a level that is beyond chochmah.

A human being has chochmah – the primary duty of a human is capture the world. Why? What does the world have to do with me? Every person from the perspective of chochmah feels in perfect unity with the world. He relates to the truth and is not separate from it. He feels at home, not like he's in a strange place.

Yidden were led into the gas chambers – they were walking. What gave them the strength to walk. How? What is making a step under these circumstances? Since even under these circumstance they know the truth.

... וחיי עולם

His memoirs

AyinBase with R' Paltiel 5/3/10 Sunday 19 Iyar 5770

Page 27 - a new discourse.  
The form of the human being is not this way to house various kochot. It is a tzelem of the etzem . The essence is described in it.

And torah is called “Our form”. Torah comes from chochmah which is the essence of atzilus.

Even though in atzilus there are also the 10 sphirot, at that level they are part of chochmah, which is “to see the truth at it is from above”. That is why atzilus is not really a created world – it is fully representative of kesser.

It was also explained previously that torah in its ultimate root it is even higher – rooted in the Primary Chochmah. This means the helem ha-atzmi (that which is concealed within the essence). This is similar to “the knowing of Himself” as it were. “By knowing Himself, He knows the torah.”

The concept of kn/owing of oneself, is something which in itself “self contradictory”. Usually I know something which is not me. So what is knowing oneself? In sechel there are 2 parts, the way I see it and the subject the way it is. Elokus has the element of the truth because it is the truth, not because it is “me”. This is where the truth and the “me” come together. So too with a human being – he is supposed to know himself – he knows his limits and his merits and demerits. He's able to look at himself from a perspective of true value, not just from a stance of, “this is me”.

This is why no matter what a human being achieves, he feels an emptiness unless it has an inherent value. A human being is essentially sechel and he must see what he does as having value at that level.

Torah is yediah – right from wrong – but it is yediat atzmi. It is knowing Himself. Not just “this is me”. Ultimately torah is rooted in oneg, but it is reflected in chochmah.

... וחיי עולם