“Ashes At The Edge of Town” p 60

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“If one pursues the world fully, you eventually become dissatisfied. People go to extremes, in an attempt to experience life. Eventually he gives up on all form and goes to the bottom-line, “there's ground under my feet and that's all I know”. This is the fallen-down position. There is no intelligence nor sensation.”

~

“Ashes At The Edge of Town” p 60

Ayin Base with R' Paltiel. Tevet 5777

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Page 60 [of the pamphlet] Below middle of the page – line starts: 'ha-aytz'. (P46 in the book)

We have identified 2 elements – the essence and the form.

Think of food. There are 2 aspects. The taste and then there's the filling of the belly.

Taste is like desire taking a form. The way it is presented is part of this.

And then there is the 'filling-up'.

These two elements are effective based on an inherent desire in the person. If there is appreciation of food it is a sign of an appreciation for life. And this desire/appreciation has to be directed.

Being 'outside' means a degenerate or 'fallen-down' position.

This would be like the case of food-addition.

This is like essence of desire – desire unhinged – the life element fallen into physicallity.

This fallen force needs to be redirected and utilized on the side of holiness. It has enormous power.

What is “fallen-dow”?

The world has 'grace and beauty' as well as 'gross and coarse' aspects – a full reality.

A person relates to these elements with a degree of intelligence. This is relating to the essential vitality that Hashem gave him.

If one pursues the world fully, you eventually become dissatisfied. People go to extremes, in an attempt to experience life. Eventually he gives up on all form and goes to the bottom-line, “there's ground under my feet and that's all I know”. This is the fallen-down position. There is no intelligence nor sensation.

He has given up of making sense of the world and he let's the world control him. He has fallen into absurd activity.

The sacrificial process of the Red Heifer is the rectification of this situation.

Burning to the level of ashes is the destruction of any meaningful form of the previous desire.

This is only done with the help of God. This is like hitting rock bottom. You cannot get out alone. This is the work of Elazar the priest/cohen, whose name means 'Kel ozer' – 'God helps'.

The form of his desire requires complete destruction by burning – till only the ashes remain – which is the simple will – an essential force.

The simple will is not made by man and it is not a reaction to anything. It is a direct creation of the Creator.

And this simple desire can now be transferred to holiness, till the man says, “Yes! This is what I want!”

This is a powerful will and longing for godliness – a will without restrictions... Godliness is the only suitable object for this desire.

It is unbridled. It is unlimited. The only unlimited desire is towards Godliness.

This is felt in the animal soul in the faculty of simple desire.

And to direct it correctly is only by means of Elazar – God's help.

One who comes to purify himself will be assisted.

The assist is to connect to the source of purity, and not to the purity as you experience it... without that assist, you fall back down. You make the experience 'yours' and you begin to fall right back.

A man goes for purity. And his job is to 'let himself be helped'. He must acknowledge it is God's Torah and His will.

This is to get free of yourself.

This way, by the service of the Red Heifer, living waters can be drawn from above.

Water is chochmah. And you may think chochmah/inspiration/widom is good enough! But when it is connected back to its source, and you step out of a worldly form then it is 'living'! And it is connected back to the infinite Source.

The minute you recognize you are not alone in your work, but that He wants your success then you are in a completely different world.

~~~

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Map of the shiur/class - prepared by Michoel Pais:

Tziur and Essence
Ex: Desiring Food. 2 aspects
1) the Taste
2) the filling up

The taste is the taavah coming into a form. Enticing. Presentation is enticing.

Filling up of stomach.

Both depend on principle of inherent desire. If one has no desirr, neither taste nor form do anything.

"Kol oichel tisaev nafshoi" - tehillim.
One can has"v lose sense of life to such an extent that even food he doesn't want.

Desiring Food is a expression of life.
But
Must be directed to Avodas Hashem.

"The fall down." Nefila.
One can eat without stop. Beyond hunger. Some (traditions & diseases) even throw up to eat more.

Koach haMisaave.
This is etsem koach of Taavah. Beyond intelligence and emotion. Totally a body level experience. Beyond justification.
Essential koach within nefesh habahamis. Seeks to satisfy a taavah. Represents essential life force of nefesh habahamis.

Ex: world has tremendous opportunity and yet much coarseness. Variety, opposites, etc. One chooses with intelligence.
Sub Ex: one lives in North Pole. Likes to walk on crisp snow, frsh air, etc. One prefers hot sun of florida beach with spread legs and hands sprawled out.

^different means to relate to the a essential chayus which Hashem gives. Real world that Gd gave him.

In seeking this path, one eventually gets totally disappointed in all these pleasures. Even goes to extremes. Ex: 200mph race car.
Loses track of what he is doing. Loses form.

Nefila. Non definable intelligently, emotionally at all. Gives up making sense of it. Falls as low as world will let him fall. Lets world control him. Addicted person. Absurd activity. Cant get ahold of himself b/c abandoned himself.

To regain his status:

Parah haAdumah. Avodah that should be done to person is done to the animal but ultimately is reflected on person himself.

Take it, sprinkle blood, burn down to ashes. Nullifying any kind of meaningful enticement from the taavah.

Ashes - essential reality (rock bottom) of the nefesh habahamis.

Elevating begins. Must be done with Eliazar. Keil oizar.  Solicits help from Hashem.

Q: why must one first go down to go up?
A: Must go to point where he recognizes that he cannot do it on his own. Needs help to drag himself out. Hashem.

Form of tree: from the 3 elements. Get burnt out. What remains? Etsem haMahoos.

Yetzer hora: Form of ra.
Rotzon, Seichel, Midos of it. (form, enticement of the ra). Design. Drawn to it, its exciting, nice presentation (ex: yummy plate of food).
^needs burning down and completely destroying.
Cannot be incorporated in Kedushah.

Remains: Ashes. Essential force of desire.
Why would one eat beyond capacity? Stomach is in control, not seichel, midos, rotzon. עצם כח המתאווה הפשוט
Not based on experience.
Simple. Does not have means of grasping. Not a result of reaction.
Poshut. Direct creation from the Creator. To create poshut must be from Creator.
Anything created by experience is not poshut.

Yet,
This can be transformed to Kedushah!
To be tokeif (powerful) rotzon to Elokus, beyond restriction, constraint, definition.

Elokus is the only Reality that there is. Pure reality of Elokus, infinite.

[To transform the 3 klipos hatmeios, cannot do it on your own.]

Rambam. 1st principle of wisdom, sh yesh sham Motsuo Rishon. Basis of existence. World cannot be without that. Powerful tokeif l'Elokus is looking for that Reality itself.

Felt in the nefesh habahamis.

Dilema: How does he know to put it into Elokus? He has fallen down "to the ground"? Where is kedushah? What does he know about it?

And That explains whybmitzvas parah adumah was davka by Eliazar.
Explained in Yalkut: Eliazar is Keil Oizar.
The G-dly Assist.
"One who comes to purify himself, he will be assisted." כי הבא לטהר מסייעין לי

Wants to be pure. As soon as he feels pure, becomes his thing, yeshus, "ah how nice", goes right back to impurity. Needs help to sense source of purity. Without this, will fall back.
His whole perception is he just wants contrary to tumah. Doesnt know that tahara requires mesiras nefesh, losing his yeshus.

Ex: breathing. Experience of life. Injection of life. Source of air pushes the air into his nostrils. If he is breathing, grabbing air, loses the sense of breathing. Torturous!
Survival vs Living

Must let himself be helped. To recognize that he is here because he is put here.

Torah is given to him, comes from Hashem, not based on what makes sense to you.

Recovering Food Addicted decides that he will enjoy something on his own? Loses it all.
Can't "appreciate" what he is eating.

Hashem is interested in his success! This givrs strength, frees him up from himself!

Q: how do I burn the tziur of yetzer hora?
A: ex: recovering food addict. Clears with his mentor what he will eat. Not based on what he likes.

(Tokeif koach hanisaveh of nefesh habahamis is stronger than the essential koach hanisaaveh of nefesh haElokis )

In today's world: give up a taavah? Why? Since babyhood: "follow what you want". Ex:in school, choose what you want to learn! Your own curriculim.

Abandoned their neshomah.
No means to guide oneself in life with this kind of foundation.

Keil Oizer.
Help: as you are climbing up the ladder, you are being pushed up.

As a result of this avodah (parah adumah, tshuva), draw down bhinas Maim Chaim.

Living waters
Isnt water just water?
Water : bhinas Chochmah
Chochmah - isnt it good enough?
Still a perception, prrsence in world. Wont hold him up.

Maim Chaim - bhinas Source of Chochmah. Not worldly, not an experiencr at all.

Meaning: Chochmah as it is in the 10 sefiros hagnuzos, before the [second] tzimtzum. No world at all, only the Motsui Rishon. This is what he gets as a result of this avodah.

You are not alone in your avodah! The Assister is interested in your success! Hence, your success is not based on your own effort and influence.

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