“Losing Interest in My Interests” p:15-16

AyinBase / Ayin Beis with R' Paltiel Sunday 4 Iyar 5773

Page 15.  At 9^th line from end of the page – (line begins:  

Picture: Batya David, Israel

'bebechinat...') For text, click: Here.

The Rebbe is explaining that the 'return' is based on the Godly intent... and this is not independent of the ratzu/run towards Godliness...

When the 'run' is in the element of 'essence' then there is rooted the true intention, which is to be in a state of 'return'. When one reaches into the essence then the inner intent for 'return' is discovered.

But in order to identify with this inner intent there has to be 'putting oneself aside'.  I am not interested in 'what I am interested in', but in what He wants... This is where the 'run/ratzu' transitions to 'return/shuv'. He gives up his personal desire, for His will.

And there is a personal relationship... he saw that essence is the only thing worth pursuing and then he sees the only way of pursuit is by means of the inner intent...

What starts the whole process of avodah/service of God? 'In the beginning God made heaven and earth -Genesis 1:1' Who started it?  He did.  It is from above.

And any process is actually initiated from Above. There is an element that He provides.

So how does man get the idea of essence. It is because He made Himself known to him. Otherwise there would be no way to go towards essence.

Essence is not something that the sechel/mind can comprehend. So it is not the mind that initiates the pursuit. If it is started by the mind/sechel, then it is imaginary and it turns into klippa.

All interests begin with a deep personal recognition that there is a Creator who makes all.

Essence is presence in the world. Where? The Godly intent is in the 'shuv/return'. Is there a fundamental value in the existence of the world? And the answer is yes, without any explanations, because that is what He wants. In the shuv/return you recognize this.

And to recognize essence there has to be 'putting oneself aside'. If I put myself aside the then I just want nothing? No. If I put myself aside so that I am able to sense the initial impetus from above that precedes everything.

The principle of the shuv/return is due to the yirah/awe. This is an inner 'fear' that comes from closeness to Him.

'Stage fright' can be based on one of two things, 'am I going to embarrass myself' and this is insignificant, he's focused on himself. Or secondly his 'fright' may have a different basis: he is awed by the moment and what needs to be accomplished... he feels inadequate to the task... This is internal. He has a personal appreciation of what he's doing.

The awe is a statement of 'who am I to approach holiness?! I should go on a path of greatness in a running desire for unity?!' and that sense is not due to fear for oneself, but due to the greatness of the mission/pursuit.

And the run towards a grand unity, is not because 'he doesn't want to be' and not because 'he wants personal benefit'. And he takes on himself the yoke of heaven to fulfill torah and mitzvoth – God's will here below.

This is like going back to your source, and the source is the original intent. Everything wants actualization – and this is not 'the will to survive'! This is the will to be what God made him! Then he's for real!

And then when he does His will he realizes His presence... reality right here in the world.